Am I Damned for Laughing?

15 Mar

Hi y’all! Haven’t been here for a long time. I’ve had lots to write about but just couldn’t get my  lazy ass motivated. It was a really tough winter….the most serious depression that I’ve ever had. It took every ounce of energy that I possessed to get out of bed somedays. And, putting on that “normal” face was a serious struggle. Most days, this was the best that I could do…..

So, I had to head back to the doctor with my tail tucked between my legs to get some Paxil. I had sworn that I would never take another psych drug because I was sick of the pharma companies putting poison out to innocent people. I’m tired of taking a drug only to find out a few years later that it’s gonna make my hair/teeth/bones/skin/liver/heart either fall off/fail/fall out/enlarge/shrink, etc. But, I had to eat my words with gritted teeth. I, also, MADE myself start exercising everyday   regularyly several times a week. So, I am feeling more like my old redneck hyper self again. YEAH!

Other things have happened that are not so great. My sister (who is a very heavy smoker) started having breathing problems about 2 yrs ago. She was diagnosed with COPD and emphysema.  She was put on breathing treatments several times a day. And, bless her little heart, she really did try many times to quit smoking.  But,Phillip Morris had her totally by the balls boobs and she just couldn’t kick ‘em. I mean this poor woman smoked so much that if they hadn’t ended the Marlboro points program, she would have been able to furnish her whole house, send her grandkids to college, get a new car, and go on a vacation just using  points.Personally, I think it would have been mighty handy if Marlboro offered an iron lung for points.

(Sadly, she is seriously starting to resemble this woman).

She spent the last year watching soap operas and alternately taking hits off of her nebulizer and her inhalers……with breaks for ciggies in between. Plus, she was put on steroids and gained about 25 pounds. Well, it’s probably fair to say that The Young and Restless, also, contributed to the extra pounds. Well, two weeks ago, I got a call from her fiance’ telling me that she was in Roanoke Memorial hospital and in not so good a condition. She was on a ventilator to breathe! I rushed off to Roanoke to see her. She had H1N1 virus plus pneumonia. It did not look promising. The doctors said they had done all they could do and the family needed to make a decision about what to do when they took her off of the ventilator. The respiratory therapist said that she did not expect her to be able to breathe on her own. So, it was up to her sons to decide what action they wanted taken on her behalf. At this time, she was not awake and could not tell anyone what she wanted done. However, she had signed a DNR order when admitted to the hospital.

My two nephews disagree about everything. They argue about how to raise their kids, religion, politics….everything.  But, I didn’t really think that they would butt heads over how to proceed with their Mom’s treatment…but they did. Both are church-going, family men who believe in God. The younger one, though, is somewhat of a religious zealot. The older one wanted measures taken to prolong his Mom’s life even after being removed from the ventilator. The younger one thought that his Mom wouldn’t want to live hooked up to anything and if it was time for her to go…well, it was time for her to go. They spent quite a bit of time in the waiting area arguing their cases to each other. I got tired of it and said that I was going back to see if she was awake and if she was, I would explain everything to her so she could make her own decision. I went back and she was awake. I sat down beside her and told her what the doctor had said about removing the vent and how she might not be able to breathe without it. I told her that the doctor could take other measures for her to breathe. Then, I told her to think about it and make up her own mind. Then I went back to the waiting area and explained to everyone what I had told her. Still, the younger one wouldn’t give up and insisted that she would not want to live relying on machines. Tensions were very high.

The next morning, after all family members had arrived, the doctors declared that it was time to remove the vent. And, they did. Miraculously, they removed the vent, put an oxygen mask on her and she was fine. She even tried to talk although her words came out in a whisper due to the vent tube being in her throat for so long. We were all extremely relieved and happy. Since only 3 people were allowed to be in the room, I went back to the waiting area.

Shortly, my nephews came out and….this is where it gets funny (to me)……

the younger one went downstairs to get some coffee. I had noticed that the older one was barely able to contain himself from laughter. I asked him what had happened and when he told me, I doubled over laughing. I didn’t know this, but after I had left the CCU room, my nephew’s wives had gone in to see my sister. The younger son’s wife decided that they should say a prayer. Her husband,( who actually does very loud street preaching..that’s a story for another day), decided to do the praying. The older son told me that he fully expected his brother to give a prayer of thanks for my sister being able to breathe without the ventilator. But, instead, he was surprised by his brother praying the following….

(this might not be the exact words but you’ll get the idea)….

“Father God, if it’s time to take my Mother home, please do it painlessly. If it’s her time to go to the other side, let us be strong enough to let her go. She has lived a good life and we will miss her. But, we don’t need her hanging on just for us. So, if it’s your will, then take her home to be with my daddy in Heaven now.”

Apprently, he was neglecting the fact that his Mom was awake and listening to him pray. And, his prayer sounded like he wanted her to go Home To Be With Jesus and his daddy! She opened her eyes really big and begin trying to mouth something.  My older nephew said that he bent down to see what she was saying. It was, “Stop! I’m awake. Don’t tell God to kill me now! Quit telling Him to take me to the light!”

I’m sitting her chuckling right now thinking about her eyes opened really wide after several days of being unconsious and unable to hear anyone. Then, some of the first words that she hears is a prayer wanting her to go to the light.

 

Now, my nephew and I refer to her as “Carol Ann”…from the movie, Poltergist.

Gotta love my family! Just hope someone else prays if I’m ever in that situation.

I’m happy to report that she is recovery nicely…..both from the sickness and the prayer. When I was there this past Sunday, she asked her doctor if she could have a Dr. Pepper and a Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pie….good redneck stuff!

 

 

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8 Responses to “Am I Damned for Laughing?”

  1. Ahmnodt Heare March 15, 2011 at 10:16 pm #

    I’m glad to hear she is doing better! Don’t forget “an apple a day”. This can take many forms (Apples, apple sauce, Apple Jacks, apple cider, etc.)

  2. godlessmonkey March 16, 2011 at 12:29 am #

    Just yesterday I visited your site trying to find out what was up with you. It’s good to “see you” Barbie. You have been missed.

  3. trailerparkbarbie March 16, 2011 at 1:12 am #

    AH…I don’t think an apple would have fit down the vent tube :)

    GM…I’ve missed you, too. I promise to try to do better!

  4. Heather March 16, 2011 at 1:57 am #

    This is so hilarious!

  5. Crochetcrochetlady March 16, 2011 at 3:36 pm #

    There is something to be said about only having one child, unless of course said child has multiple personalities and can argue with himself! Glad to hear she is doing well! Glad you are posting, too!! ((HUG))

  6. yellowcat March 24, 2011 at 7:27 pm #

    I’m glad you’re back! I’ve been on Celexa for years and I’m a better person for it. Don’t fight what you need.

  7. izziedarling May 26, 2011 at 6:38 pm #

    I think we have similar families – yikes! Love my vitamen Z (zoloft). I’m glad your sister is better and can’t believe she heard her son’s prayer. Jeez. Do you have an evangalist/ventriloquist in your tribe? I do. Everything weird is his fault.

    • trailerparkbarbie May 31, 2011 at 1:19 pm #

      Hi izzie…don’t have the evang/ventro but do have a tongue talking exterminator! Does that count?
      Thanks for the comment.

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