Don’t know the original author of this list but would happy to give them credit. This was submitted to I’mNotRightInTheHead by Ron Culley.
You know you are Trailer Park Trash when…
-Your house moves but your car don’t.
-You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
-You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
-Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
-You burn your yard rather than mow it.
-You think “The Nutcracker” is something you do off the high dive.
-The Salvation Army declines your furniture.
-You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don’t want it.
-You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
-You come back from the dump with more than you took.
- You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
- Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
- Your grandmother has “ammo” on her Christmas list.
-You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.
-You’ve been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
- You go to the stock car races and don’t need a program.
-You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
-You have a rag for a gas cap.
-Your house doesn’t have curtains, but your truck does.
-You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.
-You can spit without opening your mouth.
-You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
-Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
-You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say “Cool Whip” on the side.
-The biggest city you’ve ever been to is Wal-Mart.
-Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
-You’ve used your ironing board as a buffet table.
-A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.
-You’ve used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
-You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.
-You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.
-You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table . . . in front of her kids.
-You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
-You think a woman who is “out of your league” bowls on a different night.
-Jack Daniels makes your list of “most admired people.”
-You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
-Anyone in your family ever died right after saying: “Hey watch this.”
-You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
-Your wife’s hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.
-Your junior prom had a daycare.
-You think the last words of the Star Spangled Banner are:
“Gentlemen start your engines.”
-You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.
-The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas is in it.
-You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
-One of your kids was born on a pool table.
-You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
-You can’t get married to your sweetheart because there’s a law against it.
-You think “loaded dishwasher” means your wife is drunk.
-Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
-Your front porch collapses and kills more than five animals.
-At some point in your life you’ve been too drunk to fish.
-The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.
Still proud to be…….
Bwhaaaaaaaaaa!
It’s official…I’m trailer trash.
I sorta got that idea from past comments, yellowcat! Being trailer trash ain’t so bad though. We do know how to have fun, don’t we?
Yes, but I don’t have a name for the area I live. Boogerwoods is so perfect. Whenever I hear that dumbass song about ‘There’s always something going on down at the trailerhood’ I think ‘Boogerwoods’.
Well once my relatives were discussing about how it was cheaper to buy Dom (Perignon) at the airport instead of the supermarket…. and my mother interrupted to ask who Dom was… Does that make her a trailerpark trash?!?
jenny…that makes her High-Class white trash because she has relatives who buy Dom.
Dear Fakename, Have you seen the Canadian cable TV series Trailer Park Boys?? My very intellectually gifted son sent me the first 2-3 seasons of it on DVD. A Canadian import which is a must have!! He has also sent me some other excellent comedy series on DVD, which I will recommend to you, when & if I remember their names. So, I’m not just “book smart” only! (Joking!)
These are hi-larious!!! I was dying at the Raid one, but I loved this one too:
-The Salvation Army declines your furniture.
That’s too funny.
Hope you’re not laboring this weekend TPB.
hmmm…there are a few on there that I heard from Jeff Foxworthy “You know you are a Redneck when” schtick – is a redneck and trailer park trash the same thing?
My all time favorite from JF was “….your porch collapses and kills your dogs” hee
Holy mother of gobstoppers….gotta love the name “skippymom” ! Not sure where the sayings on that list came from originally. Got it in my email. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment.
Woohoo, Bottom Dweller. I too am officially trailer trash. I rang the Salvos 8 times asking them to pick up my enormous organ. I think they thought it was prank
frigginloon…You have an ENORMOUS organ???!!! WOW! BTW…I am forever grateful to you for accepting me into the Bottom Dwellers society. I have never felt so much acceptance in my entire life.
Where exactly did u actually pick up the recommendations to compose ““You Know You Are Trailerpark Trash When.
. Tales from the Trailerpark”? Thanks a lot -Ashton