Tales from the Trailerpark

Ya ever done one of those splatter paintings? That thing that goes round and round and mixes the paint that you pour in? I can’t remember what it’s called but you can pay to do one at an arts and craft fair or buy one that kids do at home.

Anyway, that’s what my brain feels like today. I’ve been drain-bread brain dead for writing posts lately. Then, Wham! Bam! Thank ya, Mam!….I’ve got words and ideas out the whazoo.

First…..

Dusty (who, BTW, is not bitchy) from GiftedlyOutspoken tagged me to do this:

Here are the rules: 1) Link back to the person who tagged you (that= me!). 2) Post the rules on your blog. 3) Write six things about yourself. 4) Tag six people at the end of your post by posting links to their blog sites. 5) Let them know they’ve been tagged by leaving a comment on their site. 6) And let your tagger know when your entry is up.

I’m honored. Not by the fact that I’ve been tagged to do something again, but by the fact that somebody thinks that I am smart/reliable enough to follow these rules without screwing up. This is my third tag in the last 3 days. I got tagged by snail mail Saturday for a chain mail book thingy. I was tagged by a really good friend that I have known for about 25 years. And, really, she should know by now that I either

(a) forget the rules

(b) have good intentions but never keep a chain going

(c) lose the letter which has the addresses of whomever it is that I am suppose to send a book, a dollar, a dishtowel, a poem, a chicken, or whatever to. In other words, I am the most unreliable person that you could ever pick if you want to keep something going.

(d) all of the above

Crap….I can’t even remember what the second tag was now. I think it might have been a send-a-gallon-of-gas thingy or sumptin’. I might have done that one if gas had not risen to a bazillion dollars a gallon now.

Now, on with the show….

1. I started this blog 14 months ago. I never told anyone in real life including my family. I seriously thought that no one would read it. I have had over 87,000 hits and my family still does not know that I blog. Except for one family member who is now blogging, too. Shout out to VV! And, of course, my little TrailerparkSkipper who is just like her Mamma (bless her heart).

2. My pastor asked my husband what it was like living with me and my zaniness. Hubby told him that it was like living in a constant “I Love Lucy” episode.

3.I recently acquired a dog. I nagged my husband constantly for over a year to get a dog. Secretly, I hate that little effer. It bites and scratches. It is the most hyper animal that I have ever encountered. But, I pretend to love it because I will not admit that I wish I had never laid eyes on it. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not mean to it. I feed it, walk it, pet it, etc. But, the whole time, I am wishing that I could give it back.

4. I blog at bipolarchicksblogging, also. I blog with 3 friends that I met on a forum over 5 years ago. They know more about me and the way that I think then anyone else in the world. AND, although, we’ve never met, I sincerely love each and everyone of them. That’s where I go when I can’t see the light at the end of the dark hole of depression tunnel….to them. They coax me thru bad shit. But, they, also, share any joy that comes my way with real happiness. No pretend crap. Raw, honest, and open. Shout out to D,C, and AC. I love you guys!

5.Geraldo Riveria makes me want to vomit. So, does Keith Olberman. And, Lynn Spears. And, oh hell, I’ve got a whole list:

Paris Hylton

Virgie Arthur

All the greedy fools behind the Miley Cyrus debacle.

Oprah Winfrey

Tom Cruise

Xenu

Warren Jeffs

Olsen twins

Rosie O’Donnell

Lying politicians

Child molesters (I would personally like to castrate them)

Lying drug company reps

Michael Moore

Barbara Streisand

Osama Bin Laden

Welfare cheaters

……and plenty more.

6. I play the “airhead” card a lot in life. I’m Oscar worthy at playing gullible, innocent, naive, and stupid. Behind the character, I am really wordly, intelligent, shifty, manipulative, bawdy, brass, and opinionated. I am white trash with money. I know the difference between bad taste and shabby chic. And, I’d choose bad taste anytime over shabby chic. I am not pretentious nor do I brag. I state the facts as I see them. I want to be adored but will not kiss up to anyone.

So, that’s that. Now, I have to tag six people. Let’s see…..how ’bout…..

The Vinyl Villager

Moonbeam McQueen

The Girl From The Ghetto

Southern Fried Fatty

Going Like Sixty

Salted Lithium

I DID IT!!!!!!

So, what’s everyone’s thought on Miley Cyrus? Listen, I am not insuiating anything but those pics of her and her dad give me the heebie-jeebies.

What I think is this pic is a pedophile dream pin-up poster. If you think that I have a perverted mind, then read this post that I did a while back…..

PervertForum

Had more to write about but I’m still trying to get over bronchitis and sinus infection. I’m pooped!

Nite y’all